Goodbye Rebecca

Another one of my friends died today. I have had more friends die this year than I care to remember. Actually Rebecca was really more the sister of my friend, but right now it feels like she was my best friend. Death has a way of doing that. The finality, at least from this side, of it seems to make the emotional ties stronger and more intense.

 

We were in our staff meeting when I got the call to let me know she had died. Several of us cried and the others prayed. Maybe the tears were our prayers.  There has been a lot of stuff happening lately that really makes me what to remind us all to live life to the fullest and grab every chance you get to show those you love how special they are to you.

 Take the time today to notice your feelings. Think about how special people are to you and make sure you spend your time on the things that are really important to you.

God prepares us!

The church where I am the pastor is facing another huge step of faith. Most of the people don’t even know it yet but we are moving into a time when our faith will be tested and we will be call to act on what we say we believe. It is the Degree all in moment. 

I am scared but excited as I prepare to lead my friends on this journey. God has clearly told me that the process is more important than the answer and I feel like He has laid out the process pretty clearly to me.

 

But here is what is really amazing me, I am currently doing “Experiencing God” with a group of men. This is my 3 or 4^th time doing this study but it is life transforming every time. At the end of each day’s study you are asked to write down what you think God is calling you to do in response to what He revealed to you during that study. Today I was asked to go back and review what God has been saying to me. Now remember that this goes back and covers more than 2 months and I just became aware of the stuff at church this week.

 

This is what God has been saying to me:

1)                  Surrender and Trust God IS in control.

2)                  Seek God and don’t worry about the results

a.       Pray

b.      Study

c.       Sabbath

3)                  Look for where God is already working

4)                  Simply follow God and trust He is doing stuff through me.

5)                  Walk with God

6)                  Pray more and watch more.

7)                  Relax in His hands

                  Listen to God and do what He says

9)                  Demonstrate my love to God by being more attentive to Him.

10)              Spend significant time with God

a.       Daily – Quiet times

b.      Weekly – Sabbath

c.       Monthly – Day of Prayer

d.      Yearly – Solitude Retreat

11)              Allow God to build my faith

12)              Take a step – one way or another move.

13)              Cultivate a constant state of worship in my soul

14)              Remember God IS doing what needs to be done.

15)              Spend time simply listening to God

16)              Build the staff before building a building

17)              Point people towards what God is doing.

18)              Look for God’s answers – Rely on Him

19)              Let God lead

 

God prepares us!

The church where I am the pastor is facing another huge step of faith. Most of the people don’t even know it yet but we are moving into a time when our faith will be tested and we will be call to act on what we say we believe. It is the Degree all in moment. 

I am scared but excited as I prepare to lead my friends on this journey. God has clearly told me that the process is more important than the answer and I feel like He has laid out the process pretty clearly to me.

 

But here is what is really amazing me, I am currently doing “Experiencing God” with a group of men. This is my 3 or 4^th time doing this study but it is life transforming every time. At the end of each day’s study you are asked to write down what you think God is calling you to do in response to what He revealed to you during that study. Today I was asked to go back and review what God has been saying to me. Now remember that this goes back and covers more than 2 months and I just became aware of the stuff at church this week.

 

This is what God has been saying to me:

1)                  Surrender and Trust God IS in control.

2)                  Seek God and don’t worry about the results

a.       Pray

b.      Study

c.       Sabbath

3)                  Look for where God is already working

4)                  Simply follow God and trust He is doing stuff through me.

5)                  Walk with God

6)                  Pray more and watch more.

7)                  Relax in His hands

                  Listen to God and do what He says

9)                  Demonstrate my love to God by being more attentive to Him.

10)              Spend significant time with God

a.       Daily – Quiet times

b.      Weekly – Sabbath

c.       Monthly – Day of Prayer

d.      Yearly – Solitude Retreat

11)              Allow God to build my faith

12)              Take a step – one way or another move.

13)              Cultivate a constant state of worship in my soul

14)              Remember God IS doing what needs to be done.

15)              Spend time simply listening to God

16)              Build the staff before building a building

17)              Point people towards what God is doing.

18)              Look for God’s answers – Rely on Him

19)              Let God lead

 

It’s hard being a Dad

Things started of fine as I dropped Summer off for her last first day in middle school.  We have done that for years now and so it was nothing new, only a few flitters of excitement. But then I had to take Cole to his very first first day of High school and that was a bit harder; perhaps not for him, but definitely for me. 

 

In my head I knew he would be fine. He would soon see some friends and merge into the culture without much pain.  I absolutely hated it though. I hated being the one who drove him there. I hated being the one who told him when and where to get out of the truck. He didn’t show any signs of anxiety, but I knew on the inside he was dreading taking his first steps into this foreign world full of strangers. Please don’t miss understand me, I know he will be fine, but that in no way lessens the intensity of the fear he was feeling at that moment and I felt like once again I was the one forcing him to go through the pain. I suspect we both knew that it was necessary and that it would ultimately lead to greater gain, but right then it felt like I was the source of the pain.

 

Maybe the whole experience was intensified because yesterday I had to take him to have another brain CAT scan. He is doing fine, but it reminded me of all the times I was the one holding him down when they gave him shots. I was the one who told him it wouldn’t hurt when it did. I was the one who kept saying “I know it is hard, but you need to…..because it will help you get better.” and it didn’t always.

 

It is hard being a Dad. Love motivates you to do what you think is best for your kids even when it causes them pain and makes them not like you so much. 

 

I can’t help but wonder if God sometimes feels the same way. In His perfect knowledge He knows what is really best for us and motivated by love I wonder if sometimes He says “no” to what we want and makes us face things we fear. I wonder if He loves me so much that He makes me experience things for my good even when it makes me anger because I can’t understand. 

 

Hey God, sorry for getting so mad.  I now see I didn’t understand. Really I still don’t understand, but I am trying to trust you. You know me, I will probably get mad again. So pleases know that even when I do somewhere deep inside I still know you love me and are doing what you know is actually best for me. Thanks for loving me enough to do what I need even when I don’t like it or you.  Please help me to be able to love my family like you love me.

 

And God – help all the teachers today.

 Amen